Imagination & Dewees' suicide
EDITORIAL
Matt Mills / Toronto / Thursday, October 08, 2009
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David Dewees had been a popular high-school teacher at Jarvis Collegiate Institute near Toronto’s Church and Wellesley neighbourhood since 2003. In the summers he worked as a counsellor at Ontario Pioneer Camp near Port Sydney.

Clearly he liked working with young people and until recently had a clean record as an educator and camp counsellor.

Police allege that he met two young guys at camp, 15 and 16. He supposedly kept in touch with the youngsters over the net until police say he had “inappropriate” online contact with them.

He was charged on Oct 1 with two counts of invitation to sexual touching and two counts of luring. That same day the Toronto Star erroneously reported that he had been charged with sexual assault against two 13-year-olds. In fact there’s no evidence or accusation that Dewees assaulted anyone. The Star somehow jumped to that conclusion.

Dewees was arraigned and released on $25,000 bail on Oct 2. On Oct 3 he calmly lay on the subway tracks at High Park station where he was killed by a train. He killed himself.

This story is highly engaging. There is conflict, shocking surprise, sexual scandal and a bloody end. It’s stranger than fiction, starts innocently and ends tragically. There are mysteries that may never be solved. It’s an easy hit. Don’t let anyone in media, no matter how seriously they purport to take journalistic integrity, tell you different.

Media clearly have a responsibility to tell stories like Dewees’ but the other edge of the sword is that media and its consumers — people — latch onto potentially sensational elements regardless of what is right or true. It is precisely the phenomenon that makes us gawk at car accidents.

 Imagination plays a much larger role in stories like Dewees’ than do the scant available facts.

With only the knowledge that a teacher and camp counsellor was facing sex charges, people imagined what Dewees must of have done. They imagined what was going through his mind as he befriended these young guys. They filled in blanks with their own fictions, fictions written in the ink of personal experience, desire and fear.

Virtually everyone jumped to the conclusions that Dewees killed himself out of guilt: guilt for getting too close to his charges, guilt for getting caught, guilt for embarrassing his family and guilt for being exposed as having same-sex attractions (Dewees was not, by accounts reported to Xtra, openly gay).

At 15 I could tell when older men and women were hitting on me or otherwise interested in my sexuality. I never had any trouble ending conversations I didn’t want to have or pushing away suitors I didn’t want to know. I suspect the two young guys at the centre of the accusations against Dewees are similarly astute and will survive undamaged by whatever messages Dewees sent them online. Obviously these young guys bear no blame for Dewees’ death but this must be an extremely difficult situation for them.

One reality is that we simply don’t, and likely never will, know the whole truth. And we likely won’t know how the two young guys in this story feel about Dewees’ suicide.

Another reality is that we live in a society — we have created a society — in which Dewees, who was accused only of “inappropriate” web chatter with a couple of teenagers, was subjected to a media storm that painted him as a sexual pervert and child predator. As the story unfolded publicly, with all its fiction, innuendo and assumption, he chose to kill himself.

That is at least as telling a comment on how we as a nation approach human sexuality as it is on whatever choices Dewees made in his short life.


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Reader Comments


 
Thoughtful commentary
This is the most thoughtful commentary I have read on this story. Well done.
Matthew Pavelich, Toronto Ontario
10/08/09 1:40 PM EST
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Much-needed viewpoint
A fine example of why we should support the gay press. This commentary is the salve for Rosie DiManno's vitriolic Toronto Star column about Deweer. If knowledge is food, than Mills is Jason to DiManno's harpy. Nice work.
Charles Melvin, Toronto Ontario
10/09/09 3:20 PM EST
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No More
That's a very touching tale. If you're correct then the media should be held responsible for libel by his estate. This story does not move me away from my belief that a teacher, who is in a position of trust over minors, can never, under any circumstances, whether consensual, welcome or invited by a student, engage in sexually charged language or actions with students. This is a taboo in our society. For me, this is equal to incest. A teacher is a substitute parent. Taboos carry a lot of weight and if you decide to go there, you may not be able to live with yourself afterwards. I must admit my first reaction to your headline was at least the story had a happy ending.
Steeeev, Amerika Nord Manitario
10/09/09 5:33 PM EST
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Correction
Umm, the headline "Teacher's suicide a sad tale to the end" appeared with your article which was what the last line of my previous post was referring to. Apologies.
steeeeev, City/Town Province:
10/09/09 5:45 PM EST
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Exposing names in allegations of sexual assault?
So much can be said about the circumstances surrounding Mr. David Dewees' suicide. Was he guilty and felt depressed over his actions or was he innocent and could not face his peers, family, friends and students after the media labelled him a sex offender? Should ones identity be made public when faced with an allegation of a sexual crime? On one hand, yes, the public should be made aware that if there is a previously convicted sexual predator out on bail or roaming the streets, as a parent I am sure you would want to be informed. On the other hand, what about those people who are not guilty and have never been previously charged. False accusations are real and are becoming more frequent as people realize that nothing happens to you after falsely accusing someone. Once accused of a sexual crime you are stigmatized, possibly for life. Contrary to Canadian law, you are immediately labelled and at least, suspected of being guilty. The realism that you might be innocent rarely crosses your mind as you read titles in the newspaper like "accused pedophile" or "Acclaimed Sex offender". But the truth is that false allegations are very real and are extremely destructive to the person accused and to his/her family members and friends. When I was arrested in July of 2007, my name and picture were publicized throughout the Canadian news. I was front page news in many cities. Headlines with words suchas 'pedophile', 'sex offender', and 'child predator' have all been associated with my name and my picture. I had no history of sexual assault, I had no complaints of sexual misconduct, there was no reason to make my identity known. The police will tell you that the public needs to know if there was other 'victims'. They needed to inform the public so other children, if any, could come forward. Having said that, there is a time and a place for everything. The time to make some one's identity known to the public, in some circumstances, should
Ray Collingham, Ajax Ontario
10/16/09 3:18 AM EST
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Sometimes when you among enemies...
I totally understand why he calmly laid down on the tracks, because there was not one person to defend his rights as a person. Welcome to Canada, we pride ourselves on good order and good government. Neither is true, or north, or strong, or free about this country. We always lay down calmly on the tracks and let the oppressors run over us. Canada has the worst government with the most ignorant politicians, police, courts, and smaller governments. It is a history that will be written ... actually some of us are writing it right now. Names, places, and dates for these little injustices that add up to big ones.
Mark Midensky, Toronto Ontario
10/16/09 10:29 PM EST
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Blaming the (alleged) victims?
"At 15 I could tell when older men and women were hitting on me or otherwise interested in my sexuality. I never had any trouble ending conversations I didn’t want to have or pushing away suitors I didn’t want to know. I suspect the two young guys at the centre of the accusations against Dewees are similarly astute and will survive undamaged by whatever messages Dewees sent them online. Obviously these young guys bear no blame for Dewees’ death but this must be an extremely difficult situation for them. " While The Star's treatment of this situation is reprehsible, Xtra's seems to take the other end of the spectrum. You end the above paragraph stating that the "guys bear no blame" but the rest of the paragraph is completely contrary to that belief. Just because you were aware and were able to brush off advances by adults when you were that age does not at all mean these guys are. How can you presume they will be astute enough to come out of this unscathed? Have you read the "inappropriate web chatter"? Perhaps these guys are VERY affected by this. Perhaps they were (allegedly) propositioned and that left them feeling confused, given that Dewees was a person of trust and influence in their lives. How can a responsible journalist brush off such potentials in an editorial? The slant I am seeing from Xtra these days is that if a queer (or perceived to be queer) person commits an offence in the realm of sex, then Xtra will take the role of advocate and apologist. Mills' simple assertion that these guys will come out undamaged is harmful and insulting to anyone who has been (allegedly) sexually harassed, sexually assaulted, sexually abused or just plain made uncomfortable by the sexual advances of someone they have no interest in. Very disappointed in this piece.
Jon Pressick, Toronto ON
10/20/09 2:51 PM EST
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many victims in Dewees tragedy
To be fair to Mills he said he "suspects" the lads are astute, etc....Of course there is a possibility as well that sexually inappropriate emails can be disturbing to a 15 or 16 year old boy. But we are not talking rape or even sexual assault here but inappropriate internet communications of a sexual nature. Very inadvisable and wrong if these were indeed sent by their counselor Dewees, And the charges while serious are not that high on the scale of sexual offences. Dewees, who horribly died by being run over by a train at High Park station is also a victim here. He was charged but there had been no trial or conviction yet he was all but convicted in some of the media--especially on TV and in Rosie DiManno's despicable column on his suicide which assumes that he was "hardwired" for having sex with boys and for "pedophilia" (these allegations were not in the charges and the cops did not allege them). Can you see Jon that Dewees was a victim too? And of course the lads who reported the emails while not blameworthy will probably be haunted by what happened (mostly the tragic suicide) all their lives
james Dubro, toronto ontario
10/22/09 10:23 AM EST
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maybe we can learn
This was an excellent article, I reread it today after reading about Dewees’ funeral. Perhaps we can all learn something from this tragic tale, that innocent until proven guilty is something we must struggle sometimes to force ourselves to believe and that we should never let our imaginations take flight when reading about such cases. I was thinking in particular of child porn charges which can also ruin someones life regardless if they were guilty or not or the context of the crime, I'm sure no one would consider have porn involving 17 year olds is the same as that with 7 year olds yet the charge is the same and appears the same way when told in the media, that's just an example I thought of since I knew a guy who's life was ruined under similar circumstances, family rejected him, lost friends and his job even though the charges were eventually dropped day one of his trial. Anyways since we are never told the full story in any news report about any sort of sex related arrest we should always remind ourselves that we don't know the details, we don't know know that they are actually guilty or not so we shouldn't be leaping to conclusions. Thanks for writing this article, well done.
Rich, Toronto Ontario
10/22/09 4:54 PM EST
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