Thanks to provisions to Bill 13 today, GSAs (in name) are finally protected by provinical legislation. To which I say: Fuck, FINALLY. Jesus Christ, corpses move faster than this.

Look, I understand that people are allowed to believe whatever they want to, but can we all just admit that this shouldn't have even been an argument to begin with? I mean . . . Holy shit, this is why you're not supposed to enter battery eating contests before debating legislature. It's fantastic if you believe something you've read in a book -- or more accurately, something that you heard about that is vaguely paraphrased from a book. -- But what you believe is not as or more important than things we know for certain.

What we know for certain is that kids who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender are more likely to be bullied and more likely to commite suicide. What we know is that it is WAY more important to keep kids from killing themselves than it is for you to argue semantics. And what we know is that being LGBT is not a choice, but unfortunately for you, your mother's decision to drink through her pregnancy was.

So yes, kids can now not only form, but call themselves, gay-straight alliances. And if the idea of kids coming together to acknoweldge their differences, without letting themselves be divided because of them, shatters your Christian world view, you have failed at your religion.

The only thing I love more than a new Scissor Sisters album is the buildup before it. When the Scissor Sisters were launching their last album, Night Work, they promoted it by taking out an ad on Rentboy. And this time around, they're selling Magic Hour by getting Queens of the Stone Age's Josh Homme to do a fake infomercial for them.

And holy shit, is it perfect. Not only is it hilariously awkward, but Josh Homme is fucking sex. The dude is like six and a half feet of ginger-rock fucking. The amount of blood it takes to maintain Josh Homme's erection would fill the elevator from The Shining five times over. That's how big it is. My point is, Josh Homme has a huge cock and buy Magic Hour.

If you're like me, you love Stephen Colbert and are a regular viewer of The Colbert Report, even if you do slightly prefer Jon Stewart because you've always had a thing for nebbish, Jewish silver foxes. I guess what I'm trying to say is I love Stephen Colbert almost as much as I love masturbating to The Daily Show.

Apparently, I'm not alone in this incredibly sexual devotion, as straight men everywhere have written in Colbert as the 69th hottest woman in America on Maxim's Hot 100 List. Which is still a thing, oddly enough. Seriously, have you read a copy of Maxim magazine lately? It's the only magazine I know that even smells like roofies. Anyway, Stephen's bio from Maxim:

Democracy isn’t always pretty: Sometimes it’s downright handsome. With a massive write-in vote campaign, the Colbert Nation proved they’re not only loyal but also incredibly horny.

It should be noted that he beat out several woman who are actually sexy (Christina Hendricks,  Sofia Vergara, Kat Dennings) and several who were there because I don't understand straight men (Amanda Knox, Lois Griffin, JWoww). Although in all fairness, this picture of Colbert from the Gawker message boards in drag? Yowza.

At the recent Kapow! Convention in London, DC Comics announced that one of its major characters would be coming out of the closet. Which means it's time for me to speculate wildly on the internet without any sort of credibility or proof to back me up as to who will come out of the closet. YAY, INTERNET!

Green Lantern

Well, not our Green Lantern specifically, but the one from Earth-Two is pinging on the gaydars of more than a few comic book nerds. Plus, let's face it: when the powers of you and your enemies are based on the colours of a rainbow, being gay makes all the sense. Also, look at that fucking picture. Green Lantern doesn't give a shit. He will scream at flaming skulls because FUCK YOU, SKULLS.

Odds - 1:20

Booster Gold

Booster Gold looks like what would happen if you rolled up every single Falcon Studios exclusive model into a single person, gave him time-travelling powers, and stuck him in shiny, gold, ass-hugging tights. He also acts like the star of a Bravo reality show, so if he's not gay, he's at the very least a heteroflexible party boy. 

Odds - 1:15

Wonder Woman

WW is one of those rare comic book characters who serves as an icon to both gays and lesbians. She's a strong, powerful woman, but she can also rock out the thigh-high stiletto boots. She strikes the rare balance of power, vulnerability and personality that makes for a great LGBT role model, and her appreciation for bondage would make her more than welcome in the leather community.

Odds - 1:10

Poison Ivy

I'm basing this on what I refer to as The Santana Principle. Like Santana Lopez, everyone's favourite snarky lesbian, Poison Ivy started off as a femme fatale, capable of wooing any man she wanted but never really caring for any of them. Over time, both grew closer to their best friend (Brittany:Santana :: Harley Quinn:Poison Ivy) until they realized the extent of their feelings and their true sexual preference. Also, I just think Ivy and Harley would make for a cute couple.

Odds - 1:5

Batman and Robin

How can I say this properly . . . Ah, yes. Batman and Robin are gayer than the cocks in Ryan Seacrest's mouth right now. They have a seat in the glass closet right beside Anderson Cooper. The writers of Batman and Robin can't even pretend that the whole thing isn't inherently gay and have gone on the record about it. But in all seriousness, Batman and Robin getting it on canonically would be kinda hot.

Odds - 1:2 

Seriously, LOOK AT THIS.

For most of us (and good god, I hope it's most of us), chances are we already know that you can't get HIV or AIDS from playing hide and seek. And please try to avoid the lame hide-and-seek sex jokes. I know, we all already have one in our heads. Let's just leave 'em there and move on.

But the sad thing -- even sadder than this ad -- is the fact that there are still kids, and even adults, who are so uneducated about HIV that they think skin-to-skin contact is a way to contract the disease. There are people who don't understand that a simple condom can drastically reduce the risk of getting HIV. And there are a lot of people who don't know how effective antiretroviral medication is for not only reducing the risk of transmitting the disease to others, but also for suppressing it in the body of someone who's affected so that the damage is lessened. Hell, most people who contract HIV today will actually have normal lifespans as long as they take their medication.

We're lucky that we live in an era where HIV is, if not a curable disease, one that is at least manageable. If you're responsible and you don't run into any bad luck (accidents do happen), then you can avoid HIV. That being said, we still have to educate ourselves enough not to treat those with HIV with less respect.